It's funny how certain things can result in one having a good time. I saw my ex tonight and after having one of the worst days of my life the situation really pushed me off the egde. Well, it almost did.

As per usual I resorted to tequila and an obscene amount of vodka and soon enough I was back on my way. In the bathroom I found myself asking whether it was the alcohol that was changing my mood or if it was the guy that I had seen (that I have been after for what seems like an eternity), who was, much to my delight, finally peering in my direction. These type of questions always seem to find their way into my thoughts when I drink. Probably more so when I am sober but they become clear when I am a little inebriated. These thoughts are also the reason why I don't enjoy drinking as much anymore. In the past drinking was a way that I had found to communcate with others and let go of my thoughts and fears and whatever else. Now, since I have become more of an introvert, I find that drinking only enables me to think. And due to the fact that I cannot share my thoughts, what is the point of thinking? What is the point of anything if it cannot be shared? You see, there I go again.

I just got bitten by a spider. After seeing The Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King, that REALLY freaks me out!